February is most noted for Valentine’s Day. It is a month to remember those we love, usually our spouse, our children, our grandchildren, or a dear friend. Some find it easy and natural to express affection or appreciation, others struggle with it. The struggle is often greater for members of mature blended families who feel awkward sending a Valentine’s card or greeting. That is a common feeling. On the other hand, think of those receiving nothing for Valentine’s Day. They experience feelings of loneliness or abandonment. Yet, small and simple actions make significant differences in our lives. A dreary day can be turned into a great day. Consider the impromptu hug of a child, the unsolicited compliment of a parent or friend, the smile and friendly greeting of a stranger, or the kindness of another driver allowing you to change lanes. These small acts of kindness often warm our heart and bring a smile to our face. In fact, the thoughtfulness of another can affect our attitude throughout the day.           

         Human tendency often focuses on self. How easy it is to concentrate our energy on our personal needs while overlooking the needs of those we profess to love. We may desire more fulfillment in our relationship with our (step)parent or (step)child, yet we do nothing to bring it about. Try an experiment. Initiate a small act of kindness. Then repeat it over and over again. Watch how your repeated nurturing affects others as well as yourself. It is like a seedling that withers if only watered once but thrives with continual watering and care.           

         Here are just a few suggestions for a Valentine surprise:                                                                                                                                                            ·         Send a Valentine card or email greeting to (step)parents or (step)children.                                                                                                                                         ·         Do the same for grandchildren or (step)grandparents.                                                                                                                                                                   ·         Invite (step)parents or (step)children to go out for dinner if you live nearby.                                                                                                                                  ·         Deliver a favorite candy bar or other special treat. 

      Whatever you do, find a meaningful way to say, “Thank you for being part of my life. I love you.”