During the summer my teenage son and I spent two weeks in Europe. We enjoyed visits to castles, museums, cathedrals, parks, and monuments in Germany, France, and Spain. The lush, rolling hills of Germany, the picturesque beaches of Spain and France, the twinkling lights of the Eiffel Tower hold special memories. However, the highlight of our trip was the wonderful people we met in each country. A German family invited us to spend a night with them. They waited up late for our arrival, greeted us with food and beverage and engaging conversation. The following morning they prepared a warm breakfast for us before our departure. In Spain we stayed with two different families who welcomed us into their homes with open arms and warm embraces. They escorted us to tourist spots in their city and neighboring cities. We experienced many cultural differences; some we enjoyed such as the leisurely meals and the afternoon siestas, while others we tolerated such as paying for restroom facilities and water at restaurants. Despite our different cultures, we have many common interests with our new friends whom we love as family.

            When parents remarry, children may experience culture shock. The new spouse brings with him/her habits or traditions that may seem totally foreign. If the tradition is rejected or criticized, family members miss out on opportunities to get to know one another better. On the other hand, children and parents willing to experience a different tradition like they might experience a foreign culture are often pleasantly surprised by their enjoyment of it. In the process of sharing family traditions, children and parents in blended families discover that they have common interests on which to build loving friendships.

            The most basic common trait that my son and I discovered between us and our European friends is love for family. We share other similarities as well and developed mutual respect for one another and our cultures. We will always cherish their gracious acceptance of us and the warm welcome we received in their country and home. May we consider how we can graciously accept a new stepparent or stepchild into our life and enjoy enriching relationships through mutual love and respect.

            As the holidays approach, may love of family fill your hearts and may you enjoy time-honored traditions as well as new ones.

Terri P. Smith, author, When Your Parent Remarries Late in Life. (To order your copy from www.amazon.com, simply click the book image on the right of the screen.)

Posted: October 29th, 2009 under family fun, holidays, traditions.
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            Summer time offers a variety of options for family fun and activities which lend themselves to family togetherness and bonding. Whether you are a new, young, or well-established mature blended family, longer days and warmer temperatures provide opportune times to go for a hike, have a barbecue, spend time at a water park, or enjoy recreational activities at the local park. Many families plan a summer family reunion including games for all ages, a talent show, and good food and conversation.

            Remember the leisure time you enjoyed as a child during the summer break? How nice it was not to think about assignments, tests, or bells ringing the beginning or end of class! Everyone enjoys a break now and them from hectic schedules or deadlines. Family leisure activities offer a similar break from the busyness of daily work or family routine. Activities invite families to enjoy each other’s company in a relaxed atmosphere. They promote conversation, laughter, or exercise.

            One summer our extended family congregated at a local park for a barbecue and a game of kickball. The children wanted to be on a team competing against their parents. We laughed as we ate, played, and reminisced.

            Perhaps you’ve considered inviting your parent and stepparent or your stepchildren to join you for a summer concert or picnic in the park, but you just haven’t gotten around to doing it. The good news is that half the summer remains to plan a family activity before temperatures begin cooling down. Stop procrastinating! Plan a date and initiate contact. Enjoy some leisure time together and create happy family memories.

            Please share activities your family has enjoyed doing together.

Terri P. Smith, author of When Your Parent Remarries Late in Life, (to order your copy from www.amazon.com, click on the book image on the right of the screen)

Posted: July 23rd, 2008 under family fun, successful stepfamilies.
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